Mi Familia!
How was your week? Are you enjoying summer? Can you believe it's already July? What are your plans for the 4th of July? I get to meet our new mission president and his wife that day at a zone conference! I'm really excited. They seem great. They also have some daughters here, I think. It's so weird the President and Sister Jones are gone, but I'm sure the Slaughters are going to be great.
This week was better! I'm starting to figure out what actually is expected of me. I've always had a problem with that. I have a hard time finding the balance between pushing myself and being diligent, and killing myself and being stupid. I'm getting there though.
Robert is doing great!! He got a blessing on Friday from the Elders on Friday to stop drinking, but even before that he hadn't had a drink in about 5 days. He has completely changed. He is so happy and confident now. He keeps telling us about how all his friends and coworkers keep commenting on how different he is; when he got home from church on Sunday in his shirt and tie his friends who were over at his house teased him and called him "the pastor." He loves it. He can really see how the gospel is changing his life. He's solid as a rock and it makes me so happy. He's still solid for the 13th. Which means I'm stressing out about planning another baptism. But I'll take that kind of stress. ;)
My Spanish is getting better. I can definitely see improvement. It's a lot easier to speak and I can understand a lot better. I still struggle sometimes though. I figure I've got to be to about level 300 in the Spanish-learning process. The problem is, I don't have any idea how many levels there are. Probably a million. I keep thinking I'm breaking through and then I realize I actually have no idea what I'm doing. Haha. Eventually, right?
Our area is doing so well. We have over 20 investigators, 9 of which are progressing. We had 4 investigators at church yesterday. That is so unheard of, and it's a miracle far beyond ourselves, that's for sure. But to be completely honest, I'm still not very happy.I'm not enjoying my mission like I should be. Why not? I read Scott's letters about how he's finding so much joy in missionary work even as he's struggling to find people to teach. And here am I, with all a missionary could ask for, and I'm not enjoying it. Why not?
I kind of know why, actually. I'm completely focused on myself. I'm sick of walking around in 1000000 degree heat, talking to people who don't want to talk to me. I'm sick of teaching first lessons that don't go anywhere. I'm sick of planning lessons that don't end up happening and I'm sick of struggling to find members to come with us. And I can't stop thinking about how good things were last transfer and wishing it back. So many good things are happening, but for some reason they just aren't enough to overcome the bad things.
Sigh. What should I do? Really, what should I do? I'm trying and praying my hardest to stop thinking about myself and to just love Hermana Rodriguez. To love the people here, even if all I'm doing is bringing them one centimeter closer to Christ. I really think that's the only answer: I have to forget myself. I have to focus on others and love them will all my heart. But for some reason I've just really struggled with that.
But I have determined that this transfer is going to be a good one. I don't want to just push through it and get it over with and pretend it never happened. I want it to be good! I want to look back on it and smile! I know it can be. I just need to fight to love, fight to be positive, and pray pray pray.
Anyway, that's what's in my heart right now. I figured I might as well just be honest. I'm going through a serious internal battle right now. But I know I'll come out on top. I've already seen some serious improvement. I have such stronger faith and hope than I did 3 weeks ago. Now I'm working on the charity. :)
Well, I love you all. Sorry you had to listen to some less-inspiring words this week. Keep praying and reading your scriptures (are you doing that as a family?). Go to church and have FHE. Do the little things so you will be strong enough to do the big things. Remember that God loves you and has a plan for you, every day.
Have a great week, and Happy 4th!
Mucho amor,
Hermana Lund
No comments:
Post a Comment